The Life Of A Certain Miss

[Dealing With Unexpected Life Transitions]

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According to Robert Taibbi L.C.S.W., “Ready or not, we all go through numerous transitions in our lives – living high school to go to college or work, changing jobs, getting married, having children.” Looking back when there were fewer demands to womanhood, being a mother at a young age was ideal. Women were allowed and expected to have a child as soon as she was physically able. But those were the days! Today, our society has expanded the context of being a woman that it has come to the point where the expectations are becoming too much to handle.

According to Avery Neal, M.A., L.P.C., “Many women do not know how to cope with change, and depending on the severity or amount of trauma the change has inflicted, women can face a difficult and painful time.”

Let me tell you a story about a certain Miss who now struggles to be a “Mrs.”

Miss was a careless young adult who had the world in the palm of her hand. She dreamed and made it into reality until one day, she fell in love, or so she thought. At the back of her mind, there was always the curiosity of how life would be if you’re living it with and for someone.

More than nine months later, Miss became Mrs. She married a knight in shining armor and lived her fairytale, but then again, so she thought. She didn’t realize that her changing of her surname was the start of her nightmares. Mr is not a knight in shining armor saving the damsel in distress, but the frog who’ll never turn into a prince no matter how many times you kiss him.

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Five years later, they now have three beautiful kids. Mrs. is a picture of strength that no matter the odds, she remained faithful and firm. Little did people know that with those five years, she was physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and financially abused! So much for a happy ending.

She was being beaten with little to no reason but just the fact that Mr is evil! She was drained and always left to feel worthless. She was empty- there was no space for growth anymore. All she was good for was assuring the wellbeing of her family. But who would look after her? She was alone in a room that’s crowded with her soul crushed with no faith to save her. And how can it be that she was forsaken to worry about the future of her children?

It isn’t the life that she thought she’d have when she decided to become Mrs., but she can’t turn back now. She needs to gather more strength than she ever had in the last five years. She needs to overcome her challenges to become whole again for her sake and the sake of her children.

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There is no such thing as too late when it comes to living. “It’s good to know about these perspectives on life transitions, because they show us that there’s nothing inherently bad about change,” says Susan Krauss Whitbourne, Ph.D. It’s about taking each downfall as an opportunity to rise, and as we may think that we’re alone, there are people out there who care more than we know. Don’t be a sad story. You have the power to turn your world upside down. It is about recognizing your mistakes, the people who caused you pain and your part in making it happen. But don’t stop there! Move forward and acknowledge help from people who love you! You owe them the courage to love and respect yourself again.

Rolling the Dice On Teenage Gambling: When To Seek Professional Help

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When your teen’s poker face is no longer working, it’s time to seek out medical advice.

Opportunities to instantaneously gamble is set on a general, digital level that it can easily be accessed by anybody, primarily by teens. Reiterating and thoroughly explaining to your children the insidious effects of gambling will efficiently influence them with the ideation that addiction starts when recreation stops; thus the consequences will arise. “A parent’s attitude about gambling can affect a child’s attitude about it.” says Emily Mendez, M.S., EdS., a mental health expert who specializes in addiction and substance abuse.

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Loving A Person With Depression: 10 Things To Remember – Part 1

Depression. A disease without a vaccine, it can strike unannounced at any time, anywhere, and without any semblance of a warning. Depression can always be the fire that can blaze emotional relationships if not checked and taken care of. “Dating someone with depression can be hard,” according to licensed social worker Caitlin Cantor LCSW, CST. If you intend to keep a healthy and fruitful relationship with someone who is depressed, here are 13 points to keep in mind.

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How To Assist Kids In Dealing With Trauma And Stress – Part 1

Children can feel aggravated and fearful emotions when they experience a traumatic event such as a natural disaster or when they see disturbing images on TV or the Internet. “To be diagnosed with PTSD, you usually have to be directly affected by the traumatic event, believing that your own life or those you care about are in danger,” says psychiatrist Elspeth Cameron Ritchie, MD, chief of psychiatry at Medstar Washington Hospital Center. In this article, we will provide advice on how to help kids cope with trauma and stress.

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Quick Food Guide For People Recovering From An Eating Disorder

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Therapists are used to dealing with people with different mental disorders. Hundreds of individuals have probably come to visit one throughout their career. Not to mention, there are also folks who have various forms of addiction, bipolar and personality disorders, etc., which may be impossible to recover from without professional help. Nevertheless, one of the trickiest mental illnesses to overcome is an eating disorder. According to eating disorder specialist Nicole Pipitone, MAAT, LPC, “Eating disorders are one of the most complex disorders, and have the highest mortality rate of any other psychiatric illness.“

If the problem has something to do with drugs or alcohol, for instance, the easiest way to get over them is by not hanging around people who use and abuse such substances. In case you are depressed, you need to go out of your room and be with your loved ones more often. However, when you have an eating disorder, food is practically everywhere, so it can be difficult to mend your relationship with it. That is especially true if your original goal is to lose weight and show your detractors that you will not be obese forever.

Now, if you genuinely want to heal from such a disorder and help your therapist help you, here’s a quick food guide that you can follow.

What Can I Eat?

As what psychologist Lauren Muhlheim PsyD said, “Many patients with eating disorders will only eat a restricted range of foods.” These days, there are lots of products in the market that are made for burning your body fats, but very few of them work. Most of the labeled products say that they do not have saturated fats, but it is the opposite in a lot of other foods. In truth, they are filled with this kind of fat which is very harmful to any person who is going to digest it. However, even if that’s the case, there are still a few fat burning foods which are effective for burning the extra fat in the body.

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Source: flickr.com

Millets & Peanuts

Foods that contain fibers are the ones which are always useful for burning fat. Fiber-rich foods like millets and peanuts absorb cholesterol and help to emulsify extra fat in the human body. Just to digest this type of food, we have to burn a good amount of calories, which can also help us to burn unwanted fats.

Honey

Every morning, just take a tablespoon of honey with warm water so that the extra fats will be burned while you are getting extra energy for your body.

Garlic

Garlic contains anti-bacterial compounds such as sulfur, which helps to reduce excess fat and cholesterol, making it a sufficient fat-burning food.

Chilis

Chilis are filled with capsicum, a component which helps to increase the metabolism of the human body. You should know that when the metabolism increases, the burning of the extra fats in our body also increases. This is the reason why you should eat chilies if you are looking for a fat-burning food.

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Curry Leaves

Curry leaves can directly help our body to burn unwanted fats. Aside from that, curry leaves works as a good eliminator of some harmful toxins in the body as well.

Dark Chocolate

Stress is responsible for low metabolism of the human body; that’s why stressed people often get extra fat and weight gain. Scientifically speaking, it is now proven that daily consumption of 1-2 tablespoon of dark chocolate reduces our stress. Hence, it is also a valuable food for burning fats.

Sesame Seeds

After a long time of doing researches, it has been found out that liver enzymes and some essential fatty acids increase the metabolism of our body and burn extra fat cholesterol. Luckily, sesame seeds are filled with essential fatty acids to help improve the liver enzymes and are therefore the kind of food that should be taken by someone who wants to flush out his or her extra body fats.

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Smoothies

According to scientists, smoothies can also help you to burn the additional fats in your body. Smoothies can make the satiety hormones more active, and that is a good thing because it is the hormone that is responsible for burning fat. A glass of smoothie a day will be useful to burn your fats away.

Yellow Bell Peppers

Vitamin C deficiency is also responsible for gaining extra fat in the human body. Vitamin C produces a compound called carnitine, which is very important for burning excess fat. Carnitine helps our muscles to function, and it can turn those fats to the energy that can be used by our body.

Final Thoughts

Recovery from an eating disorder can be challenging”, states Marriage and family therapist Susan Cowden, MS. I know that overcoming an eating disorder is not as easy as changing clothes. You will mostly have to deal with yourself, which you may or may not like due to your weight issues. Despite that, you merely have to lean on your therapist for support for a while, as well as your friends and family. This way, you increase your chances of recovering from the disorder.

Good luck!

Recovering From A Traumatic Experience Through A Counselor

Trauma is the result of stressful experiences such as prolonged abuse, violence, road accidents, serious illnesses, and natural disasters. The experience can leave a long-lasting effect on your body by increasing its defenses and creating a defense response when you face a similar situation. According to Kathleen Smith, PhD, LPC, “Sometimes they will experience memories or “flashbacks” of the event, or they may have nightmares about it that feel very real.” It pushes your body into a fight-or-flight condition that causes an increase in blood pressure and heart rate and loss of appetite. The psychology of trauma is a delicate topic that leads to mental health problems such as depression and post-traumatic stress disorders.

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One of the most productive means of mitigating the symptoms and effects of such experiences is through the help of a counselor. There are specialists known as trauma counselors who help people with such a condition. They provide means to help an individual address, come to terms with, and face their past experiences from these traumatic events. Each of their treatment plans is different and may take months or longer to help a patient fully.

However, becoming a trauma counselor is no easy feat. Those who take up a degree in psychology or sociology can end up as a trauma counselor. They’re required to go to a graduate school under a program that is concerned with trauma or psychology. Also, upon graduation, a license is necessary for them to pursue this job. Experience is one of the hardest things for them to gain since they don’t get too much exposure from their internship. Also, they require skills such as patience, control over emotions, and keen attention to detail in dealing with their patients.

Why See A Counselor?

“People with PTSD should seek out treatment with a mental health professional — such as a psychologist or therapist — who has specific experience and background in the treatment of post-traumatic stress disorder,” according to John M. Grohol, Psy.D. When the trauma is too much to handle to the point that you compromise your daily activities, seeking professional help may be necessary. Seeing a trauma counselor has many benefits. Here are three reasons why.

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  • Experience And Training

They underwent training in dealing with people from a broad spectrum of traumatic experiences. It may be something frequent, such as prolonged abuse, or something not many experience, like war and traumatic accidents. Given the experience and training they had for dealing with such cases, they can provide the most appropriate treatment plans to help an individual recover at the pace they need to.

  • The Person Who Listens To You

Not all of us have a person to talk to; if ever you do, there are times that you prefer to keep these stories to yourself. If you fear judgment or feel uncomfortable sharing such experiences to anyone, this may serve as your best outlet. Sometimes it is necessary to talk to someone to release the pent up feelings you’ve had. Keeping everything within may cause you to explode someday. Through them, you can remain confidential and lose that fear of judgment.

  • Treatment Plans

Trauma counselors design the most appropriate and effective treatment plans for their patients. After hearing what their patient is going through, they set up a scheme that best tackles both the root cause of the experiences and means to deal with it if ever the symptoms start to show once again. These treatments help you improve and deal with your symptoms and restore your self-esteem.

Having Difficulties Seeing One?

If you’re having difficulties in getting an appointment for a trauma counselor or don’t think that your condition is severe, you may consider self-treatment. However, this is a complicated procedure that requires the utmost patience. Here are step-by-step plans you can take.

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  1. Break free from your sense of hopelessness. Sometimes, when you get the desire to depend on something like drugs or alcohol, you should learn to stop it. By depending on these substances, you may only be contributing to worsening your condition. It is necessary that you have self-control on the things you want to do.
  2. After getting over your dependence on such substances, try to start depending on yourself. Sometimes all you need is a pastime or activity which can help get your mind over such worries. If you’re currently working with a mental health provider, it may also be important to let him or her know that you’re interested in starting an exercise program,” states Matthew Tull, PhD. Try new activities such as sports, writing, or exercise. These can serve as an outlet for all your fears.
  3. You can then seek someone to talk to if ever you have enough courage and trust to share your experiences with them. Who knows? Maybe they are going through the same situation. They may also offer useful advice that can help improve your condition. Don’t limit this to your friends; try joining support groups or volunteering.

These may serve as a temporary means in dealing with your condition. Should things get worse or hard to handle, it is best to seek professional help.

Mental Wellness: Breaking Free From Your Worries

In today’s society, one indicator of a person’s wealth is their health. People nowadays care less about fancy cars, bags, and clothes. People now lean towards a healthy lifestyle. One sign of a healthy person is their mental well-being. The famous French poet Jean Baptiste Poquelin, better known as Molière, once mentioned, “The mind has great influence over the body, and maladies often have their origin there.” Molière explains how our diseases usually originate from the mind. Sometimes, it’s all in our head. It’s all about how we deal with the situations at hand.

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Mental wellness is more than an absence of mental diseases. It is a positive state of mind where one is capable of coping with the normal stresses of life. Mental wellness is achievable when one can work productively and fruitfully as well as realize their abilities. Being in such a state enables an individual to perform to the best of their capabilities.

Benefits Of Mental Wellness

A mentally healthy individual is in control of their emotions and decisions. Being mentally healthy makes them capable of achieving beyond the normal. Not only do they perform, but they are also able to build and maintain the relationships they have with other people. Mental wellness has several benefits but here are five of its best.

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  1. Adaptability To Changes and Flexibility To Learn

People with a positive mental state are very resilient. Despite their failures, they are willing to bounce back. No matter how hard the situation is, they push forward. They are not too affected by the changes in their environment. Complete control of their thoughts allows them to devise the best decisions. According to psychologist Diana Raab Ph.D., “Being emotionally well doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re happy all the time, but rather, that you’re self-aware and able to shift as a way to feel better.”

  1.    Build And Maintain Healthy Relationships

A healthy mind enables you to get through any problem with a partner or group. It prevents them from feeling doubt, anxiety, and judgment from the people around them. Without these issues, they can maintain a healthy and close relationship with their friends, family, or colleagues. Being free from the thoughts of judgment makes it easier to form new relationships. With the proper mindset, it is easy to approach and meet new people.

  1.    Increased Productivity

People who have complete control of their thoughts enable a strong sense of self-discipline. This discipline promotes productivity in the individual. Having a clear mind allows them to organize the way they act. Also, it helps them produce better outcomes at school or work. Mental wellness encourages personal growth from being able to do their hobbies free from worries.

  1.    Positively Affects Overall Health

A healthy body comes hand-in-hand with a healthy mind. Several studies have linked a healthy mindset and mood to heart problems, aches, pains and other kinds of sickness. The reason for this is their mind overcomes such issues. Their mind conditioned their body to believe that they’re alright. Thus, people strongly believe a healthy mind can also boost your immune system.

  1. You Become Happier

Mentally healthy people, often feel contented. They couldn’t ask for anything more than what they already have. Moreover, they don’t bother worrying about the things around them. These people are less susceptible to harsh criticism and judgment. They can work productively without too much stress. Also, they have almost complete control of themselves. It allows them to excel and at the same time feel satisfied with their achievements.

Improving Your Mental Wellness

“Mental wellness however, requires some effort, in the same way physical health does,” said psychologist Jennice Vilhauer Ph.D. Any time is the perfect time to change your lifestyle. Changing it is never too late. If you’re a sensitive person who believes that they are easily affected by the people around them, have no fear. You can still improve the way you handle situations. Though, it all starts in mind. Here are four useful tips to help you:

  • Exercise

A healthy mind goes with a healthy body, and a healthy body promotes a healthy mind. It becomes a two-way process. Try jogging at least three times a week. You can also play sports you’re interested in as your hobby.

  • A Balanced Diet

Studies have found that eating can reduce anxiety. We also have this term known as “comfort foods.” These are foods that provide emotional comfort to an individual. Though make sure even if you’re eating your comfort food, you are following a balanced diet.

  • Ask For Help

There’s no harm in asking for help. Sometimes, all you need is a hand. If you are struggling with gathering your thoughts, try to talk it out. Keeping it inside won’t help you at all.

  • Have Fun

Never be afraid to have fun. You don’t need to deal with everything seriously. Sometimes, a little laugh can make your worries go away. Have thrilling and exciting journeys with your friends. Play some sports. Learn how to play an instrument. Try to find a hobby that suits you.

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Your mental wellness is essential. Make sure to keep track of your mental health. As much as possible, prevent your condition from getting worse. As what mental health expert  Adi Jaffe Ph.D. said, “Don’t concern yourself too much with everyone else’s opinion—find one that speaks to you and move forward.”

Signs Of Emotional Self-Harm (Mental Health Issues)

There’s a big difference between those confident and positive people compared to those pessimistic and always insecure ones. “The key is how often you are feeling this sense of distress, how bad it gets, and how long it lasts; that is what can help determine the seriousness of your situation,” says Abby Aronowitz, PhD. Their emotional and mental health varies depending on their social interaction and environment. These people usually don’t take time to care and love themselves and stick to a habit of putting themselves down instead of building their confidence up. With that, they couldn’t see the damage they are doing with their overall health.

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Recognizing Emotional Self-Harm

Running Away From Unwanted Emotion

Emotionally weak people often reject reality for what it is. Usually, they tend to look for diversion and use drugs and alcohol as an escape. They always feel anxious and stressed about things that are not even there, and they see no solutions in every unfortunate situation they encounter. Yes, it is perfectly okay to feel sad and afraid when there are things that fate already decided to happen. But, it is not enough reason to run away from emotions. Emotions are trying to say something, and they represent a more physiological effect. So when there’s no confrontation of feelings, people put their psychological needs at risk. They should understand the necessity of recognizing the things that upset them to develop and enhance their emotional and mental state through self-reflection. According to clinical psychologist Deborah Offner, PhD, “Emotional exhaustion is wider ranging and longer lasting than ‘a bad week.’”

Uncomfortable With Their Personality

Self-harm always start within people’s inner thoughts and feelings. So when they get ashamed of themselves, they begin to bring forward mental issues along the way. It is dangerous because it doesn’t depend on the situation. It always crawls up every time people make mistakes; they get judged from doing something, or even when they are not focusing on their positive attributes. People must understand that shame underlies destructive behavior. Yes, it is an awful thing that all individuals experience, but it shouldn’t have to become a representation whenever they feel bad about themselves. So when these individuals start to feel sorry about who they are, they begin to believe that there’s no room for them to have a healthy life.

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Belittling Accomplishments And Progress

It is a situation where self-harm becomes too apparent. Yes, it is essential not to settle in one thing and continue to set life goals. But it is a different scenario when people don’t give credit on the good things they do. When these individuals don’t acknowledge their capabilities on how far they’ve become, it damages all their mental, emotional, and spiritual aspect. Self-harm grows when they bask on emptiness and discontentment regardless of the achievement they get from hard work and persistence. Bottom line, these individuals ignore to respect, value, and trust their progress because they get too blinded by their ungratefulness.

Buildup Of Conflicted Emotions

In this state, people know what’s bothering them. They don’t try to avoid it though. But they tend not to consider seeking any help. They believe they can handle it alone, it will eventually go away, and there’s nothing to worry about the situation. Usually, they build walls and hide their feelings, and these people are good at that. However, they often forget to recognize that instead of getting better, they are only digging a bigger hole that will take them down to their emotional dilemma. With that, vulnerability becomes vital. Yes, things don’t often work out the way everybody wants it. But when there’s self-pity, it still doesn’t help the situation, nor it will never affect the outcome of any problems. No person deserves to get punished, so there’s entirely no need to beat emotional and mental difficulty.

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Thy Self Is Not A Priority

Taking care of one’s self is the most important thing to do. So when people enjoy bad habits such as smoking, consuming too much alcohol, skipping meals, and not drinking enough water, it destroys them. Not only these habits trigger and worsen anxiety and depression, but it also hinders the overall development of the brain and body. When it comes to mental and emotional well-being, these people don’t know how to consider providing quality care to themselves. That’s because they somehow believe that it is useless, it’s inappropriate, and it’s not going to be worth it.

Honestly, people know that some of their actions are undoubtedly harming themselves both emotionally and mentally. They better stop doing it before it takes them to a much worse case. As written by Raychelle Cassada Lohmann Ph.D., LPCS, “If you know someone who is engaging in self-injurious behavior reach out to him or her.“