Once or twice in our life, we experienced heartache on different levels. Perhaps that is due to our failed relationships that we thought would last. Or maybe due to the promises that we hold onto despite obviously knowing they can be broken. Or perhaps we experienced losing someone most unexpectedly. Whatever the reasons are, we know that not a single soul can understand our pain and suffering. And with those emotions, we know that our lives would never be the same.
Heartache, accompanied by grief, is a complicated thing. Some of us can better handle the roller coaster of emotions, while some would rather choose to end it all. Some can find ways to go back to their old lives, while others get stuck in a mentally and emotionally crippling situation. But despite some negative life impacts of a broken heart, we should always remember to continue and live life as is. We have to support ourselves through the healing process so we can protect our overall well-being. Here is some of the guide to healing a broken heart according to a therapist.
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Stop Pretending
The earlier we realize that we are grieving, the less complicated things for us will be. An issue with a broken heart is that sometimes, we try to make people believe that we are okay due to our overly self-confident selves. We make others think that we can easily make it because we strongly hold onto the idea of “a strong self” despite hurting inside. We cry in silence because we want to convince ourselves that moving on is an easy process. We lie to people all the time. And those lies we tell them to become our reality, making us unable to see and solve the problem.
Permission To Grieve
The process of healing or recovery should start from acknowledging the underlying emotions that we are dealing with. We should let ourselves feel all the kinds of pain that are associated with grief. We need to permit ourselves to grieve to understand the impacts of anger, sadness, loneliness, or guilt. We have to know what’s going on physically, emotionally, and mentally within ourselves to develop a coping strategy that would fit our needs. Note that it does not have to be urgent. As long as we learn to accept the situation and learn our lessons from the unfortunate event, slowly, we will make it.
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Let People Know
One significant part of healing a broken heart is expression. Thus, we need to let it all out. We mustn’t keep our emotions to ourselves as it may cause too much weight in the mental and emotional aspects. It would be best if we could find someone who we can trust to vent out our emotions. Of course, it may sound easy, but it can be complicated too when we are full of fear from rejection and judgment. But that is how the healing process works. We have to acknowledge the fact that not all people would listen to our stories. But the good part is, we will be able to manage the emotions we are struggling with.
Focus On Self-Care
Whether we like it or not, we would end up struggling to get back on our feet if we won’t focus on self-care. Thus, we need to remind ourselves that there is nothing more reassuring than taking care of ourselves. Yes, we need to embrace the difficulty of the situation. However, it is not enough reason to neglect ourselves with proper self-care just because we are broken-hearted. As much as possible, we have to rely on ourselves when it comes to full recovery because no other individual knows what we are capable of doing more than us.
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Find Happiness In Other Things
Finding happiness in other things after heartbreak can be a tough option to consider. It is natural for us to crawl up in bed and cry over spilled milk for the most part. Admittedly, we would choose to isolate ourselves and become a different person because it validates our heartache. Unfortunately, that’s one of the worse parts of grieving. Instead of diving into the pit of misery, why not choose to look for other things that we can be thankful for? Why not give ourselves a chance to do things differently? We can learn new activities, change our environment, focus on our abilities, and so on.
Final Thoughts
Yes, mending a broken heart is different from one person to another. There are times that one can recover from the pain regardless of the time spend on the process. But there are also those people who are mentally and emotionally incapable of dealing with heartache. In some unfortunate cases, their sufferings lead to psychological health problems, self-harm, and suicide.